I stopped promoting Memorial Day sales over a decade ago. My high-school friend, Tom, a Navy corpsman (a medic), is the one who convinced me to give up promoting sales on Memorial Day and Veterans Day.
I’m paraphrasing, but one night, Tom and I were talking on the phone and he said, “People thank me for my service all the time, and I almost don’t hear them. Because it’s like saying I’m sorry after you bump into someone. It’s polite, but meaningless.’
“We have two days a year to honor the buddies who I watched die, most of them screaming for me to help them. And most people use those day to head down to Home Depot and save 20% on a new washer and dryer or eat an overcooked cheeseburger at a backyard BBQ. That’s what honoring the lives of my brothers has become.”
I’ve never been able to forget that conversation. There I was, talking to one of my oldest friends, sitting on the floor of my walk-in closet, reorganizing shoes, crying uncontrollably. My friend — goofy, funny, troublemaking Tom — had suffered in ways that were incalculable, and the country he fought for, could offer him only platitudes.
So for as long as this blog exists, you will never see another Memorial Day or Veterans Day sale roundup. No e-mails will go out promoting the best finds. No recipes for flag-shaped fruit pizzas will be shared. Memorial Day is for honoring our nation’s war dead, the men and women who gave the last full measure of devotion to this nation, not selling discounted swimwear.
Instead, I am donating to TAPS, the Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors. TAPS supports the parents, siblings, spouses, and children who grieve the loss of military members who died in combat or from suicide. You can donate or volunteer on their website (they are also eligible under the Combined Federal Campaign).
Thank you.
Thank you, Abra.
I applaud you for taking a principled stance. We only have one “holiday” to commemorate veterans and reflect on the horrors of war in Canada (November 11) rather than two. In many provinces it’s not even a day off, but we recognize it by attending ceremonies and/or taking two minutes of silence at 11am. The idea of having a “Remembrance Day” sale here would be perceived as absolutely obscene.
Love it. This is reverent. Thank you.
So respectful! Appreciative of your stand! Let’s take the holiday back from consumerism.
My father always said:”Be a leader, not a follower.” Well said, thank you.
TIL! Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
I’m a Veteran. There’s nothing wrong with sales per se, but any promotions should not be using the Flag. That’s a violation of US Code. Here’s what you do on Memorial Day & Veterans Day: attend a ceremony. Go to your town’s honor ceremony, or one nearby. Make a donation. Thanks!
Thank you for the reminder of the gravity of their sacrifice.
Thank you. Readers wishing to support active duty service members and their families consider the service relief societies such as Navy Marine Corps Relief.
thank you
Navy mom here – thank you ❤️
*thank you*
Thank you, Abra.
My father and his crew were killed in a military plane crash in Africa. Thirteen families stationed in France had to leave our homes and come back to the States to start new and uncertain lives without our husbands and fathers. The aftereffects over the decades of our loss have been brutal. To say our lives were changed doesn’t even begin to describe the pain of it all. There’s a plaque honoring them at Cape Canaveral, but it’s exceedingly cold comfort.
I hate Memorial Day.
Good for you! Principles matter.
As the wife of a Vet Thank you. We live in Australia and it means so much to my husband when we go to our local dawn service and see so many young people. Lest we forget.